‘Cars 3’ is wonderful

Images courtesy Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures.

9/10 In 2006, after an immaculate decade of releasing instant classic after instant classic, Disney Pixar released its first mediocre film.

Cars, along with its numerous sequels and spinoffs, occupy an odd place in the studio’s hierarchy. Though they are, to a movie, the studio’s worst work, mid-’00s children took to them in a way that they didn’t to The Incredibles or Monsters Inc, and bought toys in droves. Between Cars and Cars 2, Pixar released four films — Ratatouille, Wall-E, Up and Toy Story 3, all much better received at the time and much better remembered now. They combined to make almost $3 billion worldwide, very impressive for four movies.

During that time span, Cars merchandise brought in $10 billion.

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Bloodcurdling ‘It Comes at Night’ stands as the year’s best so far

Image courtesy A24.

10/10 It Comes at Night might have been filmed on a golden reel.

After a zombie-esque plague rips through society, Paul (Joel Edgerton, who also executively produces) lives with his wife and son, Sarah and Travis (Carmen Ejogo and Kelvin Harrison Jr.), in an isolated, well-secured cabin. When another survivor, Will (Christopher Abbott), breaks in scavenging for supplies, the family keeps him at arm’s length, but eventually brings him and his own wife and child, Kim and Andrew (Riley Keough and Griffin Robert Faulkner), into their group. Everyone initially gets along, but tensions mount and boil over.

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‘Mummy’ is messy

Images courtesy Universal Pictures.

3/10 The Mummy is the first entry in a series that had exciting potential, but instead turned into a pandering cluster that proves quality filmmaking isn’t a priority here.

While looting in Iraq, reconnaissance officers Nick Morton (Tom Cruise) and Chris Vail (Jake Johnson) accidentally discover the tomb of Ahmanet (Sofia Boutella), an ancient Egyptian princess who was buried alive 1,000 miles away from her homeland and wiped from its history books for murdering her family. Ahmanet had turned to worshipping Set, Egyptian god of chaos and violence, and was trying to bring him into a living body when she was captured. After being dug up 5,000 years later, she chooses Morton as a sacrifice to complete the ritual.

Ever since Marvel proved they could be a thing, studios have been looking for properties they can spin into cinematic universes. It’s viewed as a neat trick to guilt audiences into seeing movies they may not be particularly excited for so they’ll be up to date when the big crossover they are excited for hits theaters. Marvel’s actual neat trick, of course, is consistently producing movies that almost everyone likes.

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The Open Bar Review – Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2

In which Paul and I graduate.

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The Open Bar Review – Tombstone

In which I desperately grasp for deeper meaning in 1993’s Tombstone, and Paul does not.

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