Monthly Archives: February 2016

If Oscar nominated films were presidential candidates

Ex Machina — The Ted Cruz campaign IMDB * Rotten Tomatoes * our review Nominated for Best Original Screenplay (Alex Garland) and Best Visual Effects Were not made in America. Aren’t entirely sure women aren’t sadistic, artificially intelligent sex toys waiting … Continue reading

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Risen proves evangelical movies are here to stay

Isn’t this the movie the Coen brothers pretended to make in Hail, Caesar! two weeks ago? Risen follows Clavius (Joseph Fiennes, the very spitting image of Michael Jackson), a Roman tribune, through the story of Jesus’ Resurrection. Clavius is charged by Pontius Pilate … Continue reading

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The Witch trades in thrills to deliver unbelievable chills

No, it’s not the scariest movie ever made. It may, however, be the scariest movie ever made entirely about boobs. Set in the 1600s a few decades before the Salem Witch Trials, The Witch follows a Puritan family banished from their plantation over … Continue reading

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I’m only doing this because of the Oscar noms: The Danish Girl

It’s the most cynical thing in the world. Former Oscar winners? Check. Based on a true story set in the early 1900s? Check. Gay* person that dies? Check. The Danish Girl was set up to be one of the most insufferably … Continue reading

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Deadpool is everything you ever wanted

There were so many ways Deadpool could have gone wrong, but it doesn’t. It hits the spot and hits it hard. If you know what I mean. The plot, easily the film’s worst feature but also its least important, starts when Wade Wilson … Continue reading

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