Reel Entropy

One of the most visibly uncomfortable actresses named during Seth MacFarlane’s “We saw your boobs” song at the 2013 Oscars, that was actually Charlize Theron’s prerecorded response. She says she loved the skit. Photo courtesy Universal Pictures

A Million Ways to Die in the West is a vanity piece, and that’s being counted against it and I don’t know why. Pretty much everything Quentin Tarantino has ever made could be considered a vanity piece to some degree. Alfred Hitchchock was such a perfectionist he used to not let people into his movies if they were late. There’s nothing wrong with vanity pieces if the driving mind is good at movies, and with two entries, Seth MacFarlane seems to be.

His new movie is set in the old west. His character, Albert Stark, is dumped early in the film by Louise (Amanda Seyfried) for the town mustache groomsman, Foy (Neil Patrick Harris). Dejected, Stark is pushed into a duel by Anna Barnes (Charlize Theron), who also teaches him to shoot. Stark and Barnes begin to fall in love, but Barnes is already married to vicious killer Clinch Leatherwood (Liam Neeson).

The thing about Seth MacFarlane’s work — even the shit on TV like Family Guy — is, the first time, it’s genuinely very funny. The constant repetition is what pushes it down. Keeping with Family Guy, the show has 231 episodes but TBS only airs, like, 15. So the seemingly prevalent idea that this movie wouldn’t be funny because Stewie and Brian’s dance routine wasn’t funny the 18th time is pretty disingenuous.

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UPDATE: Apparently, according to folklore, iron forged over a cold anvil is said to be able to ward off fairies. It doesn’t change the assessment that this particular plot point was explained poorly and applied inconsistently or that the film as a whole shouldn’t have been made, but it’s important to note that there is a basis for this.

I know you, I walked with you once upon a dream… Photos courtesy Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures

Maleficent is about Maleficent, but not “Maleficent” Maleficent. It’s not the character who’s been around since 1959, they just have the same name and wardrobe and parent company.

The film follows its title character (Angelina Jolie, with Ella Purnell and Isobelle Molloy playing younger versions) as she develops a relationship with Stefan (Sharlto Copley, played by Toby Regbo and Michael Higgins in these scenes). Stefan goes to the human kingdom to make his fortune, but runs across Maleficent again when the army he’s joined tries to take the Moors, the fairy kingdom of which Maleficent has become protector. Stefan takes advantage of their relationship and Maleficent’s allergy to iron — Iron? Seriously? — to become king. Suddenly and inexplicably evil, Maleficent curses his daughter to die on her 16th birthday.

Here’s the paradigm on which Maleficent’s character has worked for more than 50 years: Evil is Cool. Why is Darth Vader so much more iconic than Luke Skywalker or Han Solo? Because Evil is Cool. Why did the British Villains Jaguar advertisement completely overshadow the American Bob Dylan Chrysler advertisement at the Super Bowl? Because Evil is Cool.

Maleficent is Evil, and therefore Maleficent is Cool. Pop quiz — Why is Maleficent Cool? It’s because she’s Evil.

I have a riddle. What wears a black robe and Satanic headdress, is completely evil, and murders small children for spite?

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Photos courtesy 20th Century Fox

As Wolverine (Hugh Jackman) goes back in time from 2023 to 1973, Bryan Singer takes the audience back in time from 2014 to 2003 — a time when comic book movies were strange, unique affairs that were always successful and always really, really good.

X-Men: Days of Future Past, based on the highly popular comic book issue of the same name, sees the Wolverine from after X-Men: The Last Stand sent back to his body 10 years after X-Men: First Class, intent on stopping Mystique (Jennifer Lawrence) from assassinating Bolivar Trask (Peter Dinklage).

In the future, Trask’s assassination and Mystique’s subsequent capture launched the Sentinel Program, which pitted artificially intelligent anti-mutant weapons who, using Mystique’s shapeshifting ability, are able to adapt perfectly to combat any mutant. These sentinels will cause a holocaust, killing mutants and enslaving humans. To stop the assassination, Wolverine must find younger versions of Charles Xavier (James McAvoy) and Magneto (Michael Fassbender) to turn Mystique off of killing Trask.

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